Being Honest..For you Ms.PITA!

For those of you who regularly read blogs.. Do you ever read a blog about a mom who is just *so* put together, so perfect, so... wrong? You know the type, either she's a miracle (or freak) of nature & manages to juggle her 20 kids though out 45 activities while finding time to be the perfect hostess to charity dinners.... or... she's full of crap.. Ah yes..
When I sent out the link to my blog today, a friend of mine joked "If I wrote a blog, it would say.. I sat my fat ass on the computer all day & neglected the kids in front of a movie while they ate candy all day" I laughed & told her, its funny because I'd been trying to do more fun activities so I could blog with out lying.. Then I told her about a few recent adventures I've been leaving out..
"Those are the BEST types of blogs!" she told me... So I've decided.. I've been holding back.. I mean.. who knows who will read this.. my dad? My mother in law?
Lets all be honest here..My immediate family knows I'm no princess charming, so do my friends.. my dry sense of humor is well known., as well as my..shall I say it? Bitchiness.... But my married family, my more distant friends..well..we have yet to cross that bridge..

So.. climb aboard my friends! From now on, your going to get it all!!

Lets start with Andy & my adventure to the park the other week..Ahh yes..I try to do things, just Andy & I sometimes.. I think its nice to focus just on him & leave Ryan at home with dad, so he can have some undevided attention..SO! We headed off to a local park..as we pulled up, i noticed a large crowd of kids playing on the equipment.. I saw an older male on the swing with the children, 2 older females sitting on the sidelines & lots of kids running about.. As we call know, Andy is far from the social butterfuly, so we decided to walk around the large park rather than going for the playground... As we made our way half way around, we saw a shadow in the trees... I peered closer.. what the *&^%? I saw the middle ages play group attendant smoking inside a cluster of trees in the park, staring down at the kids... No... smoking while on duty watching kids.. that couldn't be right.. So I kept my hand firmly in Andys hand & kept my eyes peeled..
Yep.. Sure enough, the mistaken "attendant" was hiding in the pine trees, smoking & peering down at the kids! I got a creepy feeling as I stared daggers at him, sped up, and dragged poor Andy towards the group of people.
As soon as I got there I noticed the summer play group ( which I realized is sort of a summer daycare for kids) seemed to be wrapping it up quickly..so not wanting to be left alone, we rushed off to the car as well.. As I loaded Andy in the car, a local police car pulled up & sat beyond the trees.. on the look out for said man..

As I drove away..past the police car, I noticed the man had quickly walked away, opposite the police car, as the police car was leaving the park ( to sit across ed the street) I saw the man re emerge from the back of the park...

I called Mike & admitted..I will never call him paranoid again.

Truthful story #2- Music Time!
Yes..we tried again..we woke up bright & early. My mom came to watch Ryan & Andy & I headed off for the library & some guitar singing & book reading! All was going well.. he covered his eyes briefly at the site of an old man as we walked into the entrance..No big deal..I thought...
We got to the childrens wing & sat on the couch, making eye contact & smiling at the moms we'd previously met & introduced ourselves to the last week.. not wanting to interrupt their conversation, but smiling & hoping to say Hi when they finished talking.."Whos here for a story!!" the story time mad called.. All moms quickly ran from me & Andy.. as if we had the measles, mumps AND rubella.. I was a bit put off..but Andy didn't care.. I took his nonchalant lead & we held hands..walked for the door & then I heard it "Non.." Andy said ( no, he isnt french, he just sounds like it) I said "Music time buddy!" "NON!" he said, and pulled his hand away from me...

...Okay...so we walked to the train.. sat down, started out windows.. laughed & looked at cars & books... 5 minutes passed.. We held hands & walked to the door again.. "Nnooooo" he said this time..

Ah yes..there was no music time this week, no dancing, no stories, no giggles or new friends.. Instead, we loaded up & went home to swing in the hammock.. Ah... solitude...
A boy after my own heart!





And yes, there is a number 3.. it perhaps might be the best of them all! (Although I'm not entirely sure ANYTHING could beat the perv in the bushes!)
Just a day or 2 ago for some odd reason, I decided to load both kids up, just the 3 of us, while Daddy was at school & to head off for a Bike & Hike trail! Ohh... what WAS I thinking...


My spirits were high.. I had bottled water, blankies, extra pacis, even suckers for bribing if push came to shove! After only a few minutes of grunts & sweats with the double stroller we set off...
It only took a minute to wrangle the stroller over those stupid rail road ties & then we were off! Ahh.. the beauty of nature.. Although..there used to be a waterfall.. ah..never mind..there was still water... I guess....So on we went..

Past the 17 year old boys in neon colors, digging weeds, pas the ladies on lunch break eating in the shade.. and on to the depths of nature...

So, naturally.. Ryan begins to hysterically cry.. and of course..the sun is high in the sky at 11:30..there is no shade for us pull over in.. so as I begin to warm up, I pacify Ryan, hand Andy some water & off we go!! We make it probably a quarter mile when oh no..Ryan cries AGAIN! So once we pacify I search in the monsterous stroller for a tissue to wip ethe sweat from my brow.. In doing so, my 40 pound stroller veers approximately 2 inches to the left.."HEY HEY HEY!!!!!!" rings out an angry man voice & I look up to see a unpleasant looking man on a bike with a handlebar 'stache screaming at me.. I push my stroller of precious children 2 inches back onto "my side of the path"
He zooms past, muttering obviously pissed at the slight chance he could have had to take his bike 2 inches to his right onto the treacherous gravel path..

Yes..I muttered "Asshole" under my breath..and heaved on up towards the approaching hill...Ah..sigh... I think we walked anywhere from a half to full mile before I felt like I might quite possibly die for heat, or embarrassment as some stranger hidden in the woods peeks out & saw my running with the stroller when I thought no one was watching as I yelled ZOOOOOOMMM!

Yes..we've had some interesting events the last few weeks.. and I'm sure, as my luck should have it, there will be plenty more to come! Don't worry, I fully intend to share each & every one with you all!